Monday, 22 October 2007

tanka - closeness

two wagtails
chase each other
downstream -
hand in hand, we watch
from the green footbridge.


Closeness for One Deep Breath

29 comments:

Liza Lee Miller said...

Lovely, lovely, lovely.

I really love the parallelism! Excellent job!

Greggo said...

oh, you've captured a beautiful image here!

Ackworth Born said...

Very lovely.

tumblewords said...

I like the merged, yet separate, image here - and I wikipedia'd wagtails...:)

Janice Thomson said...

Beautiful Juliet - the imagery this gives so delightful.

Rae Trigg said...

Beautiful. This reminds me of the times I've watched birds, or fish, or turtles from a bridge.

Ron said...

Your site is a great place to learn new words it seems, embedded in your posts.
I can't think of a better way to spend time together than in watching nature.
Wagtails?

Crafty Green Poet said...

Ron - normally I would include a link to the bird, but there are different types of wagtail...

Liza, Greggo, ackworth born, tumblewords, rae, janice - thanks!

spacedlaw said...

Nice feeling of contentment in there.

Judy Brutz said...

closeness of fish, and of two people and their awarenss of nature's reflections. Well done

Crafty Green Poet said...

Thanks Judy, wagtails are birds. I should go back and add a link anyway...

Plain Foolish said...

Oh, such a clear image - and I love the connections throughout. This is simply gorgeous.

Sandy said...

I was expecting to see a duck! I love the poem and the way you put this together.

qualcosa di bello said...

perfect balance of closeness within & without

Christine said...

Very lovely image brought to one's eye. And, I learned something! Thank you.

get zapped said...

I love the playfulness. Great imagery.

Barone said...

So love the moment you captured! Your work is wonderful. Jodi

Crafty Green Poet said...

Sandy - glad I went back to add the link then!

Plain Foolish - thanks, it was connections I was after!

Barone, Get Zapped, Qualcosa di bello, Christine - thanks!

Jo said...

This is very good indeed.

AscenderRisesAbove said...

aww what a wonderful image that leaves in your mind, you are so skilled at this type of writing

Bill said...

A striking image of intimacy, both in the hand in hand contact and, more profoundly, in the shared experience. And now, in sharing with us, you bring us within the circle of intimacy.

Fledgling Poet said...

I could visualize it so clearly...just beautiful. :~)

Selma said...

This means so much to me as I can see wagtails frolicking on my lawn from my study. They are such cheeky wee things. A friend of mine calls them 'little spirit catchers' which I think comes from Dreamtime mythology. They are my favourite birds.

Mad Kane said...

Lovely images. Thanks
Mad Kane

odessa said...

wow, this is so beautiful! lovely imagery.

Writer on Board said...

Beautiful.

Jone said...

So happy and light in spirit. I am smiling.

Christine said...

I like this tanka - I need to learn how to write one. How nice to watch the wagtails. Ilike the comparison between the hand holding and the birds.

megan said...

nice to imagine this scene you've described...also, thanks for the link to the wagtails...your posts always have something for me to learn, in addition to enjoying what you've done with words & images.